I was asked today "How has God revealed himself to you?" to which my initial response (in my mind) was *lame question! next.* until i thought about it..
Seriously, when the heck has He?..
Thinking. Thinking.. my mind went back to Bec. as it more often than not does.. and I realised that God revealed himself through that agonisingly, heartbreaking moment in life..
Losing a friend, not through the laziness of not picking up a phone and calling them for months.. but forever, is not something I would ever, ever wish upon anyone. I turned into an emotionless, lifeless zombie for about 2 even 3 years.. and those years are still an absolute blur..
It was only until one particular night that I was smashed in the face by this absolutely unexplainable feeling of love that I realised there was someone out there who knew how I felt. who wanted to sit down and chat with me about it, and not interrupt with their opinion or their memories or their experience. someone who genuinely cared for my wellbeing and heart..
It was God. and it was insane.
This little 'revelation' of mine in no way shape or form justifies loosing Bec. but never the less it is comforting to find something positive finally come out of it. whether that be something this small or for someone else, something much bigger..
It's all a little crazy really..